[ yamato accepts it easily, comfortable with the routine, taking a small sip of the tea. ]
I used to think that underneath it all, he only wanted the best for me. [ it is not a yes, but not a no, either — perhaps it's easy enough to read between the lines what yamato thinks, now. ]
He was the only family I had. In Onigashima, everyone is his underling, so I never had any friends, either... not until Ace. He was my first and only friend. And when he — [ yamato's eyes look into something that is not there, a rising sun and ace's vivre card burning up in their hands. ]
... I'd lived with knowing I had at least one friend, even if he was somewhere else. But after that, I was alone again. [ a sigh. ] I don't know what I hate Father more for, everything he's done to the country of Wano... or not allowing me to leave with Ace, so I wasn't able to be there for him when he needed me.
first and only friend. that isolation isn't something he would wish to share with another, but he does understand it — though he suspects what kept them so is different. itachi had always held himself apart on purpose, having little to nothing in common with his peers. yamato was kept separate due to their devotion to kozuki oden. he knows which of the two is worse — his, at least, was a choice.
if he had been with shisui when danzō attacked... he doubts it would have changed the outcome either of that fight or the clan's fate. but he understands the desire to have been by the side of one's only friend in harrowing moments.
yet despite that desire — ）
Would he have wanted you there?
（ would shisui? whose choice is that, truly? if one's desire to protect is at war with the autonomy of the one you wish to save? ）
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I used to think that underneath it all, he only wanted the best for me. [ it is not a yes, but not a no, either — perhaps it's easy enough to read between the lines what yamato thinks, now. ]
He was the only family I had. In Onigashima, everyone is his underling, so I never had any friends, either... not until Ace. He was my first and only friend. And when he — [ yamato's eyes look into something that is not there, a rising sun and ace's vivre card burning up in their hands. ]
... I'd lived with knowing I had at least one friend, even if he was somewhere else. But after that, I was alone again. [ a sigh. ] I don't know what I hate Father more for, everything he's done to the country of Wano... or not allowing me to leave with Ace, so I wasn't able to be there for him when he needed me.
no subject
first and only friend. that isolation isn't something he would wish to share with another, but he does understand it — though he suspects what kept them so is different. itachi had always held himself apart on purpose, having little to nothing in common with his peers. yamato was kept separate due to their devotion to kozuki oden. he knows which of the two is worse — his, at least, was a choice.
if he had been with shisui when danzō attacked... he doubts it would have changed the outcome either of that fight or the clan's fate. but he understands the desire to have been by the side of one's only friend in harrowing moments.
yet despite that desire — ）
Would he have wanted you there?
（ would shisui? whose choice is that, truly? if one's desire to protect is at war with the autonomy of the one you wish to save? ）